All Vaxxed Out

August 17, 2017

Thanks. So to vaccinate or not to vaccinate? How is that still the question!? It’s 2017 and people still feel like it’s open to discussion. Famously, Jenny McCarthy was vocally anti-vax. I mean, who the hell is she anyway. I had to google it. She’s an actress. Why are we listening to anything she has to say? She is not an expert. She’s an actress. The only things I want to hear coming out of her mouth are words that someone else has written for her.

 

And even her assumptions are unfounded. This myth about vaccines causing autism was started by Andrew Wakefield. Wakefield linked the MMR vaccine with autism in research paper which was later discredited as he manipulated and falsified data. And that’s not the worse part. He was found to have been invested in a competing vaccine. He didn’t want people to not get vaccinated, he just wanted people to use his vaccine.

 

This shouldn’t still be a discussion because living now without rubella, mumps or measles is proof that these vaccinations work. I mean rubella. Most Australians would know it as German measles. It’s a horrible disease. If Die Hard taught me anything, German is bad, even if Hans Gruber doesn’t sound German.

 

Recently parents Catherine and Greg Hughes, whose own child died from whooping cough in 2015, were targeted by anti-vaxxers after they were very vocal about encouraging other parents to get their children vaccinated. Among many messages sent to the couple are accusations that they are “baby-killers” despite their son actually not having had vaccinations.

 

Anti-vaccination groups seem to be getting some traction too despite moves by the government pushes surrounding healthcare and vaccinations. A few months ago a Sydney mother started a Facebook group who want to start a child care for only people who don’t want to vaccinate their children. And this is something I could get behind. Good on them. I don’t want anti-vaxxers around my kids!

“Phil, You have kids?”

Good lord, I hope not.

This isn’t the only push of anti-vax groups. There is now a political party. Anti-Vaxxers Organise.

 

And look; Yes, there are small amounts of extra chemicals in modern day vaccines. But the alternative is to cut your arm and slide a scab into the wound. That’s how we used to vaccinate centuries ago. You see, the good thing about progress is we have found out why that worked and took that and utilised the best formula to enable modern vaccines to work.

So there is small amounts of formaldehyde, but our own bodies make it everyday.

 

That’s right. Our own bodies make it. In small amounts that are actually more than is in vaccines. Unless you’re my ex who needs huge doses to preserve her cold dead heart. The reality is all of the ingredients are safe for the vast majority of us.

 

“How about the argument that big pharma is out just to make money?”

Well yes, they do make money off vaccines, but not much in the grand scheme. If we use the US as an example, Pharmaceuticals is worth about $1.32 trillion. Of that, vaccines account for 1.82% of profits. That’s like saying Spotify are all about making artists money. It’s a big Spotify conspiracy!

 

A very small minority may have an adverse reaction such as an allergic reaction. But it’s a tiny amount, like 2-10 per million. That’s miniscule compared to the infection rate of say, measles, which is 90% of people not immunised. This is why herd immunisation works. By vaccinating the majority, we protect those that cannot get immunised due to allergies and other complications? If we can vaccinate 90-99% of the population we can eradicate a disease.

 

And this leads to the big thing that makes me angry about this. You anti-vaxxers have made me have to learn Math dammit. I hate math. When I was in high school we had two math classes. Math methods and Veggie math. Do you know what class I took?

VEGGIE MATH!

I hate math. And in order to know the facts I had to learn all this stuff.

Just vaccinate your kids!

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